Thursday, August 31, 2006

Beautiful Day!

I just returned from a walk along the Rio Grande. What a beautiful day it is! I need to make my walks along the river a daily thing again. It has been way too long! No wonder my mind has been racing with thoughts and worries. All it takes is twenty minutes among the trees, birds, squirrels and rushing water to clear my mind and make me feel totally at peace with the world. I know this, so why do I let months pass without these wonderful calming walks?

How many people out there spend their lives without ever stopping to see all the little details of nature? It makes me sad to think of these people, rushing around, to work, home from work, always hurrying around for this and that, never stopping for a second to appreciate the beauty in the little details of life. The veins in a single leaf, the ripples in the water, the clouds in the sky with all their wonderful shapes!

For some time now I have been struggling with my subject matter as an artist. What shall I paint? How shall I paint it? Should I stick to realism or let go with an abstract. Today's walk made something clear to me, I need to let my art come from inside of me, and paint all the little details that everyone else misses. It's a mix of realism and abstraction. Those little details are all around me, but in my rush to live in this crazy world, I'd forgotten about them.

I love walking along the Rio Grande, especially here in Albuquerque. As I walk out of my neighborhood and into the trees, the sound of traffic is overtaken by the sounds of birds singing and wind blowing through the leaves, water rushing(or trickling as is most times the case these days) down to the sea. It's easy to forget that you are in the middle of the largest city in New Mexico! It often reminds me of walking through Central Park in New York City. If it wasn't for my walks along the Rio Grande, I don't know if I could live in the city another day. Of course, my ultimate dream is to someday live far, far away from the city, but until then, walks along the river will have to do!

Now, off to the studio to paint!


Cynthia said...

It sounds like you are really searching for something. Your sensitive words struck a cord with me. I know exactly how you are feeling...well as much as I can imagine. I have these moments as well. Especially with my art. Just a few weeks ago, I was ready to give all my stuff away including supplies, apply for a job and get on with life.

Sometimes I think that it is my folly for majoring in art. I think a lot of it is related to whether it is accepted or not...I tend to give up too easily if it isn't.

I have made the committment to myself and to my family to give it all that I have between now and the new year (art wise) before I even think about looking for a job.

I only have 1 child who is 8 1/2, but have chosen to be there in the am and pm when school isn't in session and also summers. She is growing so fast that there will be plenty of time for me to do otherwise. In the meantime, as long as I don't think of art and money tangled up together, I'm really happy. I am trying to contribute financially as well though.

I don't know where I'm going with this one...I'm writing/thinking out loud. sorry to ramble.

BTW, I get really grumpy if I'm not outside everyday!

Paula Manning-Lewis said...

I totally know what you mean. I don't know how many times I've almost said, 'forget it, it's not worth it!'
But, I always come back to realize that there is no choice for me. Art chose me, I didn't really choose to be an artist.
I also need to get outside more!